Tuesday, June 5, 2012
This Trying to Get Knocked Up Shit is MADDENING
John and I have only just started trying to get me knocked up - and it's already driving me absolutely bonkers. Don't get me wrong... trying is fun... but the waiting business SUCKS BIG TIME.
We definitely gave it the good old college try - and now we're just... waiting. Waiting to see if I miss my period or not. Its beyond annoying. Why? Because I'm having all kinds of symptoms that could easily be PMS or pregnancy. How obnoxious is that? I mean talk about a massive mind-fuck!
I have Jewgled, (paranoid attempts at self-diagnosis via Google) every incarnation of early pregnancy symptoms, how soon you can have them, what the subtle differences are between PMS and pregnancy, how soon you can test to see if you are pregnant, if there's a test that can detect pregnancy before a missed period and so-on and so-forth. And the thing is, I can't stop doing it. Talk about being obsessive, paranoid, anxious - and above all else... impatient.
That's the thing. We're less than one month into this and I am already antsy! I am going to be the worst pregnant woman on the planet. (Sorry John).
I'm pretty sure that all of these symptoms I'm experiencing are in my head, because come on... what is the likelihood that we succeeded right out of the gate? +But... some of them are quite pronounced... like this heightened sense of smell nonsense. WTF?!? And last night, when I suspected that I might be getting a little PMSy, I started crying. We're talking weepy, intense, sobbing style crying too.
And don't get me started on the other stuff...
Frequent trips to the bathroom
Slightly bloated and a ever-so-slightly crampy a bit too early in my cycle
Distaste for certain wines that I used to love
Body feels much warmer than usual
So maybe I am pregnant.
That would just be nuts. I mean come on... what are the odds?